...way out on the corner of fucked up and evil...

OH GOD I love that Peter Pan movie! I mean, I was already aware of this fact since it's shelved on the top lefthand side of my DVD collection, which is where I stack my most-loved stuff for easy acess, but I just watched it again and it's like ALL OF MY LIFE I HAVE BEEN WAITING TO GET ENOUGH DISTANCE ON THIS FILM SO THAT I CAN WATCH IT AGAIN AND HAVE ALL OF MY LOVE COME FLOODING BACK TO ME!

Jeremy Sumpter is so awesome, you guys. I sometimes totally forget about him because I am too busy admiring the wonderfulness of Jason Isaacs, but he is a fucking amazing actor. That bit right at the end where Hook lets the crocodile eat him, and as he resigns himself to his fate there's a shot of Peter closing his eyes and saluting with his sword, and it is magnificent and wonderful and just so great I have no words!

What happened to Jeremy Sumpter, anyway? I kind of assumed he would go on to be in like eight million things after Peter Pan, but I never saw him again. Has anyone else seen him in something other than Peter Pan? I demand to know why he is not currently improving the quality of the many TV shows I watch by appearing in them and actually portraying emotion and stuff. Shame on you, Jeremy Sumpter, you'd better not be fucking dead or appearing on reality TV or something else hideous and awful!

Also, I saw the trailer for the new Sherlock Holmes movie, and apart from inexplicable Rocky Horror!Downey Junior, it looked pretty good. I normally want to kill Jude Law, but RDJ has this weird super-power where he makes normally unbearable people slightly tolerable by his presence - see also Gweneth Paltrow in the Iron Man movies.

One more thing that I completely love that has nothing to do with the rest of this post - that bit in Twin Peaks where those Swedish dudes come to stay at the Great Northern and they make loads of noise and wake Cooper up, and he's super pissy and ranting into his little dictaphone thing to Diane about it and after he asks for her to send him earplugs, he's like "I didn't expect to need them on this trip, but as you can hear..." and he holds the recorder up in complete silence for a few seconds to record the noise and then he clicks it off in this really definitive, "so there!" kind of way, and all the way through the scene he has this AWESOMELY grumpy face on him and it's BRILLIANT.

I just wanted to share that with you all. I love Agent Cooper's grumpy face. One day I hope my grumpy face can reach such heights of grumpiness. It is unlikely, but still something to strive for.

It turned out I wasn't sick after all - I was having an allergic reaction to a new perfume Hayley was trying out. Buzz and Johnny had the exact same reactions - once she'd washed it off, Buzz and I were fine, but poor Johnny has ended up with a rash on one side of his face, presumably because of the three of us, he's the only one sharing a bed with her.

It's a shame, because based on the first few whiffs I got before my airways closed up and my lips turned blue, it actually smelt pretty good. I would have been tempted to buy a bottle if it didn't induce hideous death within minutes of inhalation.

Anyway, I went to see Harry Potter, and it was... okay. I should say at this point that I haven't read the last book, and I've missed at least one, probably two of the films, so I was a bit lost on some stuff. Like, what the fuck is going on with abused wife!Lucius? Oh Lucius, what happened to you?! You were always my favourite, with your snarky tone and sneery face and silky hair and general magnificent bastardry, and now... you guys, he's the Harry Potter franchise equivilent to Butters from South Park. Seriously dudes, Draco is cooler than him now.

Also, for the record, if I ever come across some dude who is dying, I really hope he doesn't ( Read more... )

Neville was the man, of course, and Professor McGonagall once again proved conclusively that you do not fuck with Maggie Smith - she fucks with you.

I love Helena Bonham Carter so much. I want to lick her face. I bet she would taste like epic, mixed with crazygold. I loved that bit when ( Read more... ) and the tottering on her high heels was hilarious. And while I love her outfit, I'm not sure that it's practical when having a big old slaughter-the-little-children-fest in a magical forest. Then again, I've never killed a bunch of teenagers in a forest or anywhere else, so what do I know?

I thought Ralph Fiennes actually kind of sucked as Voldermort, but then maybe it's hard to emote with half your face edited off. There's a scene where he goes all aggro on some random Death Eater and shrieks out that killing curse thing, and it's completely phoned in. I was like, oh please, Voldermort - I get angrier than that when I find out someone has eaten the last packet of blueberries! I could totally be a better villian than him, and I would let poor Jason Isaacs get his shave on, too. What a douchebag.

Anyway dudes, that's my thoughts on the last ever HP movie - I'm going to go take a shower and then watch Peter Pan and enjoy Jason Isaacs being appropriately piratey and beautiful and well-groomed.

Has anyone else seen the trailer for that Sky Atlantic movie, Neverland? I'm sort of intrigued. Probably it won't be as awesome as the 2003 version with Jason Isaacs, but it might be as good as something that doesn't have Jason Isaacs in can hope to be.

Apparently there's another Peter Pan reimagining next year where Peter is a killin' dude and Hook is trying to catch him. That sounds pretty retarded, but it has the kid from Sleepwalking in it, so who knows?

Also, I saw Pirates of the Caribbean 4 today. It was okay - I didn't come out of it feeling like I'd just wasted two hours of my life, but for a movie that has Johnny Depp and Ian McShane, it wasn't anything like as awesome as I thought it should be. Also, the missionary and the mermaid were so pointless and uninteresting, it actually made me miss Keira Knightley and the gay blacksmith. Unworthy.

Anyways, I think I'm going to go for a swim and get some seaweed to hide in my brothers shoes, so laters!

Oh dudes, I am watching the Buffy movie for the first time in like, ten years (seriously, the last time I watched it I still lived at home and it was on TV) and it's so random and campy and beautiful and it's totally making me want to watch the TV series again even though I just watched all of it* like a month ago. Like when they're interviewing kids at the end and that one guy is all, "They had fangs and they were biting people and their eyes were totally dead - I think they were Young Republicans" and that part where Buffy steals the dude's bike and he's like, "Skank! You're a dyke! I'm going to tell the world!" or the fact that her friends are totally Heathers and the one guy who is still dying even after the end credits and it's so beautiful.

Also, this massive spider just ran across my floor and I was so busy giggling about the Buffy movie that I dropped a book on it before I even had a chance to freak out. Yes, it is that good!

Also I watched Interview with the Vampire today and oh my God, how much is the making of Claudia like, the vampire equivilent of deliberately getting knocked up in order to trap a dude into a relationship? She's like a three foot high walking piece of emotional blackmail. Andandand that bit where she tells Louis that she wants to leave and he's all whiny and like, "No that will never happen MY LIFE IS MISERY AND DESPAIR!" and she makes this awesome "get over yourself" face that makes me laugh and which is made even funnier by the fact that she's like seven years old, and that bit where she tells Lestat she has a present for him and he's all, "Then I hope it's a hot babe with boobies which you will never have!" and I'm like OH TOTAL BURN because nothing is worse than the "you'll never be a wo/man!" burn (see also: Kenny from Highlander or Peter Pan in that awesome movie where Jason Isaacs was Hook).

ALSO! Snithy, you should totally have let me show you Bully this weekend - it had male strippers, but they were young and sleek and, if not actually attractive, at least not eye-gougingly hideous and Clivelike. Also, naked Nick Stahl! Being naked and totally mean and punching people for no good reason! Nick Stahl is surely one of the most under-rated beautiful men of our time.

Then again, Bully was actually good so you probably would have had an allergic reaction to it seeing as you only like things that suck in the not-good way, Mrs "Carnivale and OUATIM and the 4400 are crap oh wait let me watch two seasons of the Lair and give us both brain damage!"

Man, you know that fuckwad who created Kidulthood, and all those other even bigger fuckwads who went on about how great it was, when in fact it was a shitty movie about a bunch of dumbass chavs doing dumbass chav things and not getting sterilized and/or shot down like rabid dogs which is really what needed to happen, both in the film and in real life? It would be so great if Larry Clark could give those people lessons in how to make movies about young people that are dark and true and also don't totally fucking suck.

*And by "all of it", what I actually mean is "the first three seasons because I try to pretend everything after Graduation Day didn't happen."

Big Wolf on Campus makes Miami Vice references! It can't be natural to be as pleased by this as I am, but come on, "Next week we'll be discussing the rise and fall of Don Johnson"? Mr D, you are my hero even if you do eat cute monkeys and pick fights with teenaged boys dressed as Micheal Jackson!

In other news, my Gay Pirate Book* has arrived, courtesy of Liam Neeson and Royal Mail, along with the second season of Miami Vice (OMG, that dude stole his Ferrari! Kill him, Elvis!) and the first season of Drawn Together. Not that this prevented me splurging on the Chronicals of Narnia boxset in Computer Exchange and discussing the Neverending Story with the cashier, but still, that should satisfy my entertainment needs until the third season of XM:E comes out.

*Captain Hook: the Adventures of a Notorious Youth, by JV Hart and illustrated by the guy who illustrates the Lemony Snicket books. I'm on a Peter Pan kick this week.

Oooh, lookie what I nicked from imbeiaiel:

Comment and I'll ...

1. Tell you what song/movie reminds me of you.
2. Tell you what celebrity/public/fictional person you remind me of, either personality-wise or looks-wise.
3. Give you one word that I associate with you when I think of you.
4. Tell you what colour(s) I associate with you.

Most productive day yesterday: whilst noodling 'round Borders waiting for friends to show up, discovered that they have At Last got more copies of POTO in. So YAY Eriky goodness for me. Also bought Inkheart by Cordelia Funke and Dracula 2001, which while being a terrible film, has the dual redeeming features of Johnny 'Sulky McByronpants' Lee Miller and Gerard 'Mister Sexypants Phantom' Butler.

Plus Virgin didn't have Reign of Fire or American Psycho. Le pout.

Also, in amazingly unFroodlish display of willpower, managed to resist buying their only copy of Dario Argento's Phantom of the Opera , despite urgings of nefarious companions. My newly-forged iron will LAUGHS IN THEIR FACES. Then it runs out of Virgin and away from temptation.

All lectures were cancelled today, so decided to make cauliflower cheese (very tasty), play with Thlayli (fully clothed, to prevent a repeat of the Underwear Incident), and read Neal Stephenson's "Quicksilver" (would probably enjoy it more if I hadn't seen Escaflowne, and therefore prone to imagining Issac Newton as a floating head with a beard full of rollers and also to muttering "You killed Folken!" at random moments).

In other news, finally got to see the new Sherlock Holmes film that aired over Christmas... ( Read more... )

Movie Meme

The rules

-- Pick one dozen movies that are ones that you have special feelings about.
-- Pick a few lines of dialogue.
-- As people guess the film, strike out that entry.
-- After the film is guessed, explain why that movie made the list.
( Read more... )

I declare this Jason Issacs Day. On this day, all people loyal to the Godliness of Jason Issacs shall honour his birth by watching lots of films with him in, and thinking about how sexful he is.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have a date with certain boy-molesting one-handed pirates in cool hats.

Have I mentioned how much I loathe telemarketers? Because I really do. With the hate of a thousand smaller hatreds.

In more pleasant news, have been watching 'The Master Blackmailer' with Jeremy Brett. In the bath. Also, being an Irish plumber. It was all shades of cool.

Did I mention, bath scene?

I'm going to start a list of all cool films with cool bath scenes.

1: From Hell
2: The Master Blackmailer

Hmm... this leads me to conclude that I don't watch enough films with gratuitous bathing scenes.

And no, that scene with Micheal in 'Peter Pan' emphatically does not count.

I notice that the dustjacket of the Complete Sherlock Holmes, while it does have the funny hat, magnifying glass and pipe, does not contain the bottle of cocaine or the case of needles. A shocking act of revisionist... something, if you ask me.

Speaking of Sherlock Holmes:

"I could imagine his giving a friend a little pinch of the latest vegetable alkaloid, not out of malevolence, you understand, but simply out of a spirit of inquiry."

And also:

"He appears to have a passion for definate and exact knowledge (...) but when it comes to beating the subjects in the dissecting rooms with a stick, it is certainly taking a rather bizzare shape."

Fucking hero, I tell you!

In other news, the Duchess of York is on the Peter Pan DVD. Filthy fucking whore, she gets everywhere. She probably got to Never Never Land by riding Budgie the Fucktarded Helicopter.