froodle | Entries tagged with tim burton

Wow, Sweeney Todd is a miserable fucking bastard. I mean, I get he's sour about the whole deported-to-Australia, not-actually-dead-wife and yeah-actually-stolen-baby thing, but at a certain point, a tragic backstory and the fact that he's Johnny Depp in period clothing isn't enough to prevent me rolling my eyes at his endless bloody sulking. Jeez. Get over it already.

Sleepy Hollow is still lovely though. Has anyone seen the TV show they're basing off it yet? That sounds like it will also be lovely, though probably less lovely than 90 minutes of Christina Ricci and Johnny Depp staring at each other was.

I don't really know what the point of this post was. Probably that I need pictures of Johnny Depp and Christina Ricci looking at each other.

Posted via m.livejournal.com.

If Billy-Ray and Sweeney Todd got into it, who would win? I think Billy-Ray could take Sweeney in a straight fight, but I also think he'd be so freaked out by all the singing that he'd bail out in the middle due to excessive weirdness.

Posted via m.livejournal.com.

I bet when Ichabod Crane went back to New York at the end of Sleepy Hollow, and resumed his regular, non-ghosty policin' duties, he totally stopped giving a shit about science and proper investigating rules and not torturing fake confessions out of dudes.

I like to think that he just showed up, did his regularly scheduled eight hours, then went home to shag Christina Ricci. And also stole lots of quills from work and spent most of his time updating whatever the equivelent of Facebook was. Visagebook? Darregotype book? Whatever. That's what I think happened.

Posted via m.livejournal.com.

So dudes, my wetsuit arrived today and because a) the postman woke me up early delivering it and b) you know, it's NEW and I get excited about new things, I had to go try it out in the sea. And then it started raining. And I was totally warm. It was great, I've only come back because the fog started rolling in and I couldn't see properly.

Also, my room is now approximately 40% less of a shambles than it was before - I got motivated to start unpacking when Johnny commented that 'It looks like an episode of Hoarders in here - maybe a Halloween episode or a special addition called "When Goths Go Wrong" or something.' Nothing like being compared to mentally ill, morbidly obese Americans to kick-start a person's clean-up efforts. It still kind of looks like a hurricane went crazy in a Forbidden Planet store, but slightly less so than it did before, so that's okay.

In other news, I discovered a while ago that a book I quite enjoyed, "Johannes Cabal the Detective", was actually the second in a series, the first being "Johannes Cabal the Necromancer." I just finished reading it and it was awesome. The same spooky, off-kilter world-building that you get in movies like NBX or the Corpse Bride, or books like Gloom Cookie or May Bird, but combined with a snarky narrative voice and the subtle mocking of it's own genre that Joss Whedon used to be so awesome at back in the day. I think I'll probably like the second one even more if I was to reread it now, aswell.

I have to go now, my mum is making ginger scones and I want to eat some before Buzz Lighthair gets there and steals them all. Laters!

Today started off as one of those days where it rains, then it clears up for about twenty minutes, just long enough for you to get your coat, shoes and bag, and as soon as you open the front door the weather gods HAMMER DOWN ON YOU from above. It cleared up about three o'clock, but I was deep into my book by that point, so I didn't go out til just before sunset. It was lovely though - I went to Port Erin beach, which faces West, and climbed down into the ruins of this old outdoor swimming pool and watched the sun set, then I bought jam, then I came home.

The book I was reading was Nekropolis by Tim Waggoner - it's about this zombie private detective, and the world he's created is basically the grown-up version of the one from Jodi Lynn Anderson's May Bird series (if you liked the Corpse Bride or the Nightmare Before Christmas, you should totally read the May Bird books, as they are awesome) and it was interesting and well-realised and the plot wasn't bad, but...

You guys, he had a love interest. An alive, human love interest. And he's a zombie. Sorry dudes, I don't care how brave or pure of heart or whatever he is, he is a ZOMBIE. Zombie/human romance is just gross. Probably I'm some kind of racist for thinking that, but OH WELL. Anyway, I ordered the second one in the series because creepy necrophiliac smoochies aside, it's pretty enjoyable.

On a final zombie-related note, I hope everyone else is enjoying Zombie Jesus Fest and eating lots of chocolate and/or brains, according to your religious preferences.

God, there are some right divs at the House of Gas. The fire alarm went off today and, I kid you not, our fire warden stood there in the middle of the corridor, blocking the way, bleating about whether or not we knew where the assembly point for our call centre was in the event of a fire. I was like, "Hmm, is it perchance outside of the burning building?" How do these people make it to adulthood? Fuckwad.

Anyway, some important points to note:

The Wolverine movie is beautiful. It's a bit soap-opera-ish with the evil long lost brother thing and of course it has Gambit in (boo!) but really, this is about Hugh Jackman wearing leather and lots of hairspray, and a flimsy excuse for a plot strung together wuth awesomely choreographed fight scenes.
Hairspray has a bit wrecked the earlier X-Men movies for me. Well, not X3, that one came pre-wrecked. But now I cannot look at Cyclops without seeing Corny Collins and wanting him to dance and sing and be massively inappropriate on a daytime kids TV show. And then I feel sad when it doesn't happen.
If the Wolverine movie is beautiful, then Coraline is even more beautiful. I cannot describe the wonder. Go watch!
I love the movie version of Interview with the Vampire. I sometimes forget how much I love it because I'm a bit shallow and there's nobody I really think is hot in there,* and also nowadays it's a bit tainted from the combined batshittery of Tom Cruise and Anne Rice, but I was watching it on Sunday and as soon as I heard those first few bars in the opening sequence, all my love for it came rushing back.
The first half of the fourth season of Supernatural is semi-awesome. That's not the same as being full-on good, by the way. It's like, a bit good. There's a lifesized walking, talking, suicidal teddy bear (awesome), a stubbly angel who's a bit gay for Dean (awesome), an episode which is basically Supernatural does the Universal Studios Monster Mash (awesome to the power of a sideways eight thing) and BUNNY! Unfortunately, there's also creepy Padaleckisex, the stubbly angel isn't as stubbly or as overtly gay for Dean as I feel he could be, and Bunny is really mean. To like, everyone. Oh Bunny, how have we come to this? Also, there were these totally mean witches who tried to ruin Halloween for everyone. Boo, mean witches! You're lucky it was only Sam and Dean that showed up to punish you with guns. If Jack Skellington had been there, then you'd be sorry.
I had better have pig flu! I feel like shit and the only thing keeping me from curling up and dying in misery is the thought that I am actively spreading a contagion that will wipe out billions of humans. If this turns out just to be a bad cold, I will be pissed.
The Assassination of Jesse James is soooooooo booooring. Casey Affleck may be mildly less hideous than his sibling, but they are both gaping voids in the fabric of the universe, into which any semblence of talent or charisma is dragged, screaming, into the darkness, ne'er to return. Also, it is so badly directed, they have to have some random narrate what's going on in every scene.

Anyway, I think that's all the important life lessons I learnt this week - I trust you will all take them on board and be enriched by my wisdom. I'm going to watch the Wire and bemoan Bunny's fall from grace. Oh Bunny!

*Okay, it has Christian Slater, but he's in it for like ten minutes, and althoughg Antonio Banderas is normally hot, let's face it, white base and a Morticia Addams wig are not a good look for him.

The Wolverine movie is beautiful. It's a bit soap-opera-ish with the evil long lost brother thing and of course it has Gambit in (boo!) but really, this is about Hugh Jackman wearing leather and lots of hairspray, and a flimsy excuse for a plot strung together wuth awesomely choreographed fight scenes.
Hairspray has a bit wrecked the earlier X-Men movies for me. Well, not X3, that one came pre-wrecked. But now I cannot look at Cyclops without seeing Corny Collins and wanting him to dance and sing and be massively inappropriate on a daytime kids TV show. And then I feel sad when it doesn't happen.
If the Wolverine movie is beautiful, then Coraline is even more beautiful. I cannot describe the wonder. Go watch!
I love the movie version of Interview with the Vampire. I sometimes forget how much I love it because I'm a bit shallow and there's nobody I really think is hot in there,* and also nowadays it's a bit tainted from the combined batshittery of Tom Cruise and Anne Rice, but I was watching it on Sunday and as soon as I heard those first few bars in the opening sequence, all my love for it came rushing back.
The first half of the fourth season of Supernatural is semi-awesome. That's not the same as being full-on good, by the way. It's like, a bit good. There's a lifesized walking, talking, suicidal teddy bear (awesome), a stubbly angel who's a bit gay for Dean (awesome), an episode which is basically Supernatural does the Universal Studios Monster Mash (awesome to the power of a sideways eight thing) and BUNNY! Unfortunately, there's also creepy Padaleckisex, the stubbly angel isn't as stubbly or as overtly gay for Dean as I feel he could be, and Bunny is really mean. To like, everyone. Oh Bunny, how have we come to this? Also, there were these totally mean witches who tried to ruin Halloween for everyone. Boo, mean witches! You're lucky it was only Sam and Dean that showed up to punish you with guns. If Jack Skellington had been there, then you'd be sorry.
I had better have pig flu! I feel like shit and the only thing keeping me from curling up and dying in misery is the thought that I am actively spreading a contagion that will wipe out billions of humans. If this turns out just to be a bad cold, I will be pissed.
The Assassination of Jesse James is soooooooo booooring. Casey Affleck may be mildly less hideous than his sibling, but they are both gaping voids in the fabric of the universe, into which any semblence of talent or charisma is dragged, screaming, into the darkness, ne'er to return. Also, it is so badly directed, they have to have some random narrate what's going on in every scene.

Notes From This Weekend:

Cadillac Records is fucking awesome. Also, Beyonce is totally not-fail as an actress. I wasn't even a little bit embarrassed for her at any point. Well done, Beyonce.
Push is okay. It has Papa Midnite as the main baddie, and he's cool, but the main dude is like the love child of Dean Winchester and that dude who plays Dracula in Blade: Trinity. Not as hot as it sounds, guys. Also, the cast list was all, NOW WITH ADDED TOM BALDWIN! and then I watched it and Tom Baldwin was in it for like ten seconds before he died. Not cool, Push. We do not go around killing beautiful earnest Tom Baldwin.
Zachary Quinto was put on this earth to torment me. They showed the trailer of the new Star Trek movie and I swear, it's like God is sitting there going, "Hey Froodle, here's a really seriously fucking hot guy for you to stare at, but the catch is, every time you see him on-screen, he's going to be playing a character that you want to kick in the nuts." Why, Zachary Quinto? Why?!
There is a new Fast and Furious movie. Paul Walker was being failsome and excessively American as usual. Vin Diesel was being retardatical as usual. It was all very disgraceful.
CORALINE WHY ARE YOU NOT OUT YET?
Likewise, WOLVERINE MOVIE WHY ARE YOU NOT OUT YET?
Mohinder, you fail at science so much. I am completely filled with distain for you. SCIENTISTS! PLEASE DO NOT INJECT YOURSELF WITH UNTESTED SHITTERY! IT NEVER ENDS WELL!
I really hate Woody Allen. Honestly, I want to kick him in the nuts so badly, Zachary Quinto will probably end up playing him in the biopic. Cassandra Dreams is fucktarded beyond belief. How anyone can take Colin Farrell and Ewan McGregor and turn it into a bloated, self-important, mind-numbingly dull wankfest is beyond me.
Profit is beautiful. Oh Profit. You are my only friend.
The fact that there is yet another Underworld movie makes me hate God.

On a totally unrelated note, the House of Gas has arranged an hour and a half lecture on the Golden Ratio and Fibonacci sequences. At work. For the workers. Except that if you're scheduled to be on the 'phones, you don't get to go, which begs the question, who the fuck is expecting a bunch of phone-monkeys to give up their free time to go to a lecture, at work, on advanced mathematical concepts? Are we going to be fighting crime with them? Will the FBI and adorkable curly-headed mathematicians be involved? No? Fuck off then. I'm just so confused by the rational behind it - most of our retardo customers can't add VAT to a fuel bill without having a meltdown - is this something King Gas thinks is going to be useful in our day to day lives? WHAT IS GOING ON?!

Notes From This Weekend:

Cadillac Records is fucking awesome. Also, Beyonce is totally not-fail as an actress. I wasn't even a little bit embarrassed for her at any point. Well done, Beyonce.
Push is okay. It has Papa Midnite as the main baddie, and he's cool, but the main dude is like the love child of Dean Winchester and that dude who plays Dracula in Blade: Trinity. Not as hot as it sounds, guys. Also, the cast list was all, NOW WITH ADDED TOM BALDWIN! and then I watched it and Tom Baldwin was in it for like ten seconds before he died. Not cool, Push. We do not go around killing beautiful earnest Tom Baldwin.
Zachary Quinto was put on this earth to torment me. They showed the trailer of the new Star Trek movie and I swear, it's like God is sitting there going, "Hey Froodle, here's a really seriously fucking hot guy for you to stare at, but the catch is, every time you see him on-screen, he's going to be playing a character that you want to kick in the nuts." Why, Zachary Quinto? Why?!
There is a new Fast and Furious movie. Paul Walker was being failsome and excessively American as usual. Vin Diesel was being retardatical as usual. It was all very disgraceful.
CORALINE WHY ARE YOU NOT OUT YET?
Likewise, WOLVERINE MOVIE WHY ARE YOU NOT OUT YET?
Mohinder, you fail at science so much. I am completely filled with distain for you. SCIENTISTS! PLEASE DO NOT INJECT YOURSELF WITH UNTESTED SHITTERY! IT NEVER ENDS WELL!
I really hate Woody Allen. Honestly, I want to kick him in the nuts so badly, Zachary Quinto will probably end up playing him in the biopic. Cassandra Dreams is fucktarded beyond belief. How anyone can take Colin Farrell and Ewan McGregor and turn it into a bloated, self-important, mind-numbingly dull wankfest is beyond me.
Profit is beautiful. Oh Profit. You are my only friend.
The fact that there is yet another Underworld movie makes me hate God.