...way out on the corner of fucked up and evil...

Oh noes! Poor Atia! I keep forgetting to say this (because I am shallow and easily distracted by shouty menfolk in leather skirts) but I love Atia. She's such a cold-hearted, power-hungry, manipulative bitch - I wish I had the balls to be as much of a cunt as she is. And now she's in Egypt and Mark Anthony won't even see her and she's all sad and it's totally making me cry. And Octavia is all, "You suck, Mark Anthony!" Even Vorenus is extra-glary and distainful at his behaviour. For shame, Mark Anthony. Your tattoos and eyeliner may be beautiful beyond all reason, but meening on Atia is very unacceptable.

Alao, grown up!Octavian is a cock. He doesn't deserve to have been played by Ickle Midshipman Blakeney. Dick.

Oh, that is it, Supernatural. You and I are just not friends anymore. You can take your two hot Winchesters and Sam and your misleading rumours of homoerotic exploits and get out of my life for good, because I do not like it when I have nightmares when by rights I should be having dreams about monkeys or something else good!

Fortunatly for me, I am the kind of girl who always has one or two irons in the fandom-fire, so I shall console my grief over my breakup with Dean and John by watching the second season of the Wire. And oh my God, Omar is my hero. The tie! And somebody finally putting that piece of shit Levy in his place, hoorah! Personally I was holding out for Rhonda bludgeoning him with a briefcase, but getting smacked down in front of an entire courtroom was so much more awesome. He has inspired me to take up robbing drug dealers for a living. Now, if only I knew where to find a) a shotgun and b) some drug dealers. You may be suprised to learn this information is not listed in the Yellow Pages.

In other news, Rome. I'm not saying it wasn't enjoyable, I'm just saying that the entire show can be summed up as "Ickle Midshipman Blakeney grows up and fucks his sister. But not, apparently, his great-uncle." I do love the whole Pullo/Vorenus thing, though - especially where Vorenus pimps him out to Cleopatra. Even in Ye Olde Tymes, pimping your friends is always good for a laugh.

On a completely unrelated note, I think everyone here should read the Varjak Paw books. Because if there were two things I would say makde the world a better place, it would be more Kung-fu cats and less Will Ferrell. I hate Will Ferrell.

I do, however, still love the Tribe, and especially Bray who has won my heart with his incredible campness. That scene after he finds Spike floating in the hotel pool, and the other Mallrats are like, "Gasp! Ebony!" and he's all, "But don't you think if she had killed him, she'd be bragging about it? Like, 'Don't mess with me!'" and then he actually does the finger-snap head-toss thing like he's Foxxie Love or whatever and oh my God it is just the most hilarious thing ever and I love him.

Anyway, little space-monkeys, I have a box of pastries here that aren't going to eat themselves, and the second season of Battlestar Galactica is calling to me, so farewell!

Thief Lord porn! With Princess Bride references, no less. Liam Neeson loves me, yes he does.

Watched Master & Commander this evening; I'd forgotten how much I adore that film, even if it is basically Tom Pullings' wet dream. The jokes, my God, the appalling yet hysterically funny jokes. Stephen being a pissy little bitch. Ickle Midshipman Blakeney, aww! The sealion that says "Argh!" Jack slagging off whalers in front of the head whaler dude. Poor, sad Tom and his unrequited Jacklove. Killick's cantankerous mutterings. Random appearence by a hobbit. And did I mention, the jokes? I thought I was going to die during that last scene; poor Stephen is handling his disappointment remarkably well for someone who is, as previously mentioned, a pissy little bitch, and Jack has to go and make that remark about flightless birds not going anywhere - it's hil-fucking-hairy-house, as we used to say back in college,

I am highly disturbed by the fact that Ickle Midshipman Blakeney appears in Rome, not only sexin' the ladies (well, a lady. Of the night.), being accused of homosexual trysts and playing the future Emperor of Rome. To quote the immutable Brother Johnathan: "How is he supposed to rule the civilised world? He's only got one arm!" Oh, Ickle Midshipman Blakeney.

Also disturbing is the fact that Kelso's dad is played by the guy who played Mars's dad in Eerie, Indiana. I'm not sure what this information means, but I do note that both boys have unnaturally shiny brown hair. Hmmm...

Holy shit, Tower of Fang actually has some members! Thanks to komikron for these wonderful icons:



Eventually I might get around to making a community banner or something... maybe.

I went to see Alexander with Anne Marie on Sunday night - it's actually the second time I've seen it. I totally blame Granamry and her hilarious 6-part MPREG parody, Daddy's Little Conqueror, for my almost swallowing my icecream spade during that opening line about Hephaestion's thighs.

Spoiler-laden Alexander-related thoughts... ( Read more... )

In other news, Jessica's latest money-making scheme involves a business that makes designer clothes/boots/carrying handbags for dogs. Yeah. Seriously. We were talking about what she should call it during lunch today:

Jess: What about "Doggy Desire"?
Alan: Animal porn.
Jess: "Doggy Style"?
Me: Gay porn. Better, but still misleading.
Jess: Yeah, I could have one of those "How Did You Hear About This Site?" things on the checkout.
Me: "Google", "Lycos", "From a friend", "seeking ass-sex".
People at tables around us: *stare*

And finally, more Stick Figure Erik: ( Read more... )

I'm still listening to the 2004 soundtrack. Keep telling myself, it's not that Gerrard Butler can't sing, it's that his Phantom has a lot more Raw Emotion. Eventually I may even believe it. Yay for self-delusion!

My City Drive tat arrived today - obligatory band t-shirt and some cute little badges. Also included was a signed picture of the band, which is spiffy and stuck on the wall next to my autographed Tom Felton photo.

Today is the second day of Hexmas, known as Blakeneyday. To celebrate, Hex has given me a new icon to wear. Huzzah!

It's far too hot here. I have my feet in a bucket of iced water. Fucking summer.

Bought Peter Pan 2003 on DVD today. Woo! Boy-molesting fun for all. Though Peter is approximately 70% less molestable than Blakeney, this is only because Blakeney has broken all existing records for molestability. Patrick O'Brien, Max Pirkis, guy that did the casting on M&C: I salute you.

Did men wear socks in the Victorian days? Just a thought.

Continuing on the Sherlock Holmes vs the Scarlet Pimpernel debate, who would freak out faster:

Holmes when faced with a flirtatious Marguerite Blakeney, or the Pimpernel when faced with a flirtatious Watson?

Answers and death-threats on a postcard, please.

I'm feeling talkative today.

Jason Issacs would make a kick-ass Sherlock Holmes. Mmm, caustic. Now all I have to do is cast the other characters, steal a script from someone, kidnap a film crew, hijack a studio and bribe, blackmail and otherwise cajole my actors into working for me.

Also, the Scarlet Pimpernel's name is Lord Blakeney. Okay, it's Percy Blakeney and he's got two arms, but still, it seems everyone's favourite midshipman has famous relatives.

I have two seminars tomorrow and have done work for neither of them. Let me see: European law vs the Scarlet Pimpernel...

Maybe the Scarlet Pimpernel can kidnap my lecturer for me. She's French. That would be neat.