froodle: (bitch)
FRICKARD YOU FUCKING FROG MOLESTING PIECE OF SHIT!! I am under my CuddleCrew and im not coming out until King Falls AM fixes this. if anyone needs me, you can reach me by moving the rainbow alpaca.
froodle: (derpklaus)
WAIT IS DAVIS DEAD?!
froodle: (pony)


But... I don't understand why firing arrows at a burning building is helpful?
froodle: (Default)
Some dude just asked me if I always dress this wildly when I go out on a Saturday night...

I'm wearing an Adventure Time t-shirt.

So either Finn and Jake have become an in-the-know code for some awful act of sexual depravity, or I just discovered a whole new level of vanilla.


Posted via m.livejournal.com.

froodle: (Default)
So, I just finished the new Skulduggery Pleasant book.

FUCK EVERYTHING. I WISH I HAD NEVER LEARNT TO FUCKING READ. LITERALLY I AM BASICALLY SOUR FOREVER NOW OH MY FUCKING GOD.


Posted via m.livejournal.com.

froodle: (Default)
Locked myself out of my flat, no answer on other doorbells, had to climb in through downstairs neighbours window, only to bump into him coming out of bathroom stark naked. Weekend already shaping up to be an eventful one.


Posted via m.livejournal.com.

froodle: (Default)
What? What? WHAT?!

New Skulduggery Pleasant, dudes. What the fuckedy fucking fuckcakes?!

.........


No, seriously. What?!?!
froodle: (Default)
What? What? WHAT?!

New Skulduggery Pleasant, dudes. What the fuckedy fucking fuckcakes?!

.........


No, seriously. What?!?!
froodle: (Default)
Urgh. I had this whole post planned about how great True Blood is and about how Liamneeson has finally answered my prayers for a series about redneck vampires who don't fight crime or really do anything, but then I came on here and the sheer fugliness of the new profile page caused poison to drip from my eyes and now they burn with agony and I don't feel like it anymore.

ANYWAY! I hope everyone had lots of fun celebrating the holy trifecta of awesomeness that is Halloween-Bonfire Night-Froodle Day - I have been watching Battlestar Galactica and coming to the conclusion that every show should have one snarky scientist character, because Gaius makes everything so much better through his presence. I may even love him more than Rodney and Kevin, and that is very impressive because I love Rodney and Kevin so much and also neither of them ever accidently destroyed the human race, unlike Baltar. That scene where Gaeta is being a big gay liar and wrecking Badger's stragety of stragetic awesome and Gaius kicks off at him and he's like, "The whole fleet knows this man tried to stab me through the neck. And you missed! Butterfingers!" Favourite line of any episode of BSG, ever. And BSG is hardly short of brilliant lines. I'm not saying I want to get stabbed just so I have the opportunity to use it, but still.
froodle: (Default)
Urgh. I had this whole post planned about how great True Blood is and about how Liamneeson has finally answered my prayers for a series about redneck vampires who don't fight crime or really do anything, but then I came on here and the sheer fugliness of the new profile page caused poison to drip from my eyes and now they burn with agony and I don't feel like it anymore.

ANYWAY! I hope everyone had lots of fun celebrating the holy trifecta of awesomeness that is Halloween-Bonfire Night-Froodle Day - I have been watching Battlestar Galactica and coming to the conclusion that every show should have one snarky scientist character, because Gaius makes everything so much better through his presence. I may even love him more than Rodney and Kevin, and that is very impressive because I love Rodney and Kevin so much and also neither of them ever accidently destroyed the human race, unlike Baltar. That scene where Gaeta is being a big gay liar and wrecking Badger's stragety of stragetic awesome and Gaius kicks off at him and he's like, "The whole fleet knows this man tried to stab me through the neck. And you missed! Butterfingers!" Favourite line of any episode of BSG, ever. And BSG is hardly short of brilliant lines. I'm not saying I want to get stabbed just so I have the opportunity to use it, but still.
froodle: (Default)
I just finished watching that episode where Gary Navarro (he was calling himself Clay Porter, but whatevs, he's Gary Navarro to me) comes back because some evil Army dudes kidnap his family and Colby is all, filled with ANGUISH and PAST ANGST and then at the end he gets that picture of him and Dwayne out of the drawer and puts it back on the desk and looks all sad and wistful and-and-and...

Um. Uh.

I really want Colby/Dwayne smut now.

OH GOD STOP JUDGING ME!
froodle: (Default)
I just finished watching that episode where Gary Navarro (he was calling himself Clay Porter, but whatevs, he's Gary Navarro to me) comes back because some evil Army dudes kidnap his family and Colby is all, filled with ANGUISH and PAST ANGST and then at the end he gets that picture of him and Dwayne out of the drawer and puts it back on the desk and looks all sad and wistful and-and-and...

Um. Uh.

I really want Colby/Dwayne smut now.

OH GOD STOP JUDGING ME!
froodle: (bitch)
Dudes. Dudes! I just got back from seeing incandescens, where there was cake and the final episodes of Avatar and an awesome musical version of the Hunchback of Notre Dame and a really bizarre Teen Titans two-parter that involved the bastard lovechild of Winston Churchill and Stephen Hawkings (hahah, I know I made at least two of you die a little inside just from reading that) and, and!

A musical version of Jekyll and Hyde starring David Hasselhoff!


I haven't watched all of it yet, but you guys, it's so utterly wrongsick I cannot express it with mere mouthwords. The Hoff gurns and sings atrociously and gropes random corpses and wears a waistcoat that is made of utter fail. I am saving the rest of it for next weekend, when HAG will be over and we can combine forces to give it the scorn-filled adulation it deserves, but in the meantime, I leave you with this thought:

I would still rather watch that than have to sit through How To Lose Friends And Alienate People again.


That's right, Simon Pegg. You now rank lower than the Hoff on my list of human beings. I hope you're proud.
froodle: (bitch)
Dudes. Dudes! I just got back from seeing incandescens, where there was cake and the final episodes of Avatar and an awesome musical version of the Hunchback of Notre Dame and a really bizarre Teen Titans two-parter that involved the bastard lovechild of Winston Churchill and Stephen Hawkings (hahah, I know I made at least two of you die a little inside just from reading that) and, and!

A musical version of Jekyll and Hyde starring David Hasselhoff!


I haven't watched all of it yet, but you guys, it's so utterly wrongsick I cannot express it with mere mouthwords. The Hoff gurns and sings atrociously and gropes random corpses and wears a waistcoat that is made of utter fail. I am saving the rest of it for next weekend, when HAG will be over and we can combine forces to give it the scorn-filled adulation it deserves, but in the meantime, I leave you with this thought:

I would still rather watch that than have to sit through How To Lose Friends And Alienate People again.


That's right, Simon Pegg. You now rank lower than the Hoff on my list of human beings. I hope you're proud.
froodle: (Default)
So, on my bus route home, there's this massive billboard advertising some internet dating agency. It's basically a row of little couples like those male and female silloettes you get on public toilets, but it's got two male siloettes wearing cowboy hats and one pink lady silloette and a clown. And I'm like, okay, Brokeback Mountain, I get it, but lest we forget, Jack dies horribly and Ennis ends up living in a trailer! How is that a fucking recommendation for a dating service? "Use us, and you too can be beaten to death on some dirt track by a bunch of angry tire iron-weilding yokels!" Oh goody! Sign me up for that. And a clown? Why, dear God, would you want to marry a clown? And why would you advertise it?

Seriously, people, think this stuff through. Otherwise I'll have to come along and make fun of you for it.
froodle: (Default)
So, on my bus route home, there's this massive billboard advertising some internet dating agency. It's basically a row of little couples like those male and female silloettes you get on public toilets, but it's got two male siloettes wearing cowboy hats and one pink lady silloette and a clown. And I'm like, okay, Brokeback Mountain, I get it, but lest we forget, Jack dies horribly and Ennis ends up living in a trailer! How is that a fucking recommendation for a dating service? "Use us, and you too can be beaten to death on some dirt track by a bunch of angry tire iron-weilding yokels!" Oh goody! Sign me up for that. And a clown? Why, dear God, would you want to marry a clown? And why would you advertise it?

Seriously, people, think this stuff through. Otherwise I'll have to come along and make fun of you for it.
froodle: (Default)
So, in case it wasn't obvious, I've seen the Da Vinci Code. And it was awful. I cannot use strong enough terms to warn people away from this travesty of justice. Tom Hanks should be shot, Dan Brown should be crucified, and that silly French bird needs a one-way ticket to the Reject Bin. Even Sir Ian could not rescue this film from the swirling vortex of pure shitty movie-ness that it creates. Were this movie a living thing, I would recommend cutting off all its limbs and throwing it in a pool of molten lava as a punishment merely for existing.

I did, however, see the trailer for PotC2, the new Bond film and Poseidon. To take the last first, why?! I mean, come on, the original TV series was rubbish anyway - and not in the fun way that 70s tv shows can sometimes be - the new one was rubbish even though it had Jayne and he was all wet, why the fuck did they decide there needed to be a movie? This goes with Underworld 2 and Dr Dolittle 3 in the "what were they thinking?" pile. It's also advertised as coming "From the director of Troy and the Perfect Storm", which serves more as a warning label than a reccomendation. PotC2 looks, unsuprisingly, totally awesome. There's a weird Cthulhu-pirate (he wears a hat!) and Johnny Depp in eyeliner and sexy facial tattoos. I think that's really all that needs to be said. James Bond looks suprisingly not-boring, mostly because of Daniel Craig and Judi Dench, but I probably won't bother seeing it anyway. Just because this one might suck less than every other James Bond movie ever made doesn't mean it won't still suck.
froodle: (Default)
So, in case it wasn't obvious, I've seen the Da Vinci Code. And it was awful. I cannot use strong enough terms to warn people away from this travesty of justice. Tom Hanks should be shot, Dan Brown should be crucified, and that silly French bird needs a one-way ticket to the Reject Bin. Even Sir Ian could not rescue this film from the swirling vortex of pure shitty movie-ness that it creates. Were this movie a living thing, I would recommend cutting off all its limbs and throwing it in a pool of molten lava as a punishment merely for existing.

I did, however, see the trailer for PotC2, the new Bond film and Poseidon. To take the last first, why?! I mean, come on, the original TV series was rubbish anyway - and not in the fun way that 70s tv shows can sometimes be - the new one was rubbish even though it had Jayne and he was all wet, why the fuck did they decide there needed to be a movie? This goes with Underworld 2 and Dr Dolittle 3 in the "what were they thinking?" pile. It's also advertised as coming "From the director of Troy and the Perfect Storm", which serves more as a warning label than a reccomendation. PotC2 looks, unsuprisingly, totally awesome. There's a weird Cthulhu-pirate (he wears a hat!) and Johnny Depp in eyeliner and sexy facial tattoos. I think that's really all that needs to be said. James Bond looks suprisingly not-boring, mostly because of Daniel Craig and Judi Dench, but I probably won't bother seeing it anyway. Just because this one might suck less than every other James Bond movie ever made doesn't mean it won't still suck.

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