...way out on the corner of fucked up and evil...

I always thought Lost was confusing to me because I only ever saw random episodes at a friend's house or when I was home for a weekend, and because the only person I know who's really into it is Jonathan, whose skill at explaining things so incoherently that it leaves the listener more baffled than before outstrips even my own ("It's like a proper devil island! And there's people and stuff. Oh, and polar bears, and there's like, this hole in the ground and it's fully messed up..."). But now I realise, it's because it makes absolutely no fucking sense. I've given up trying to follow the plotlines and am going to content myself with giggling over Charlie and perving on Sawyer and Sayid. And Sawyer/Sayid. And Sayid/Sawyer and pretty much any variations on that theme.

And speaking of Sawyer, what is he, like Lost's answer to Trowa Barton? Or possibly Yuki, on account of them sharing anti-Trowa tendancies like having nice hair and actual personalities. But seriously, what is this mindset of "Oh hey, you know that guy who totally ruined my life? Yeah, I'm going to take his name. That'll show him, the rapist/shyster/rich boy scum!" Christ Almighty, go to a therapist already.

But, fuck it, right? Because ultimately it's all about the hot men, which Lost has in spades. And by "in spades", I mean "three of". Because Boone is a whiny metrosexual who fancies his own sister, and Jack has stupid hair and makes this weird chicken-face when he's sad.

That stupid whore upstairs is using her fucking exercise bike again. I was hoping it wouldn't come to this, but it's time to unleash the ultimate weapon; Strawberry Kiss Kiss. For those fortunate souls among you who have never seen the Tokyo Babylon OAV, SKK is quite possibly the most annoying song in the entire world. Imagine, if you will, Aqua, if they were Japanese, singing in English without actually being able to speak English, and therefore singing the lyrics as randomly strung-together sounds with no comprehension of how the words should actually be pronounced or seperated from the words immediately before and after them. Gravitation fans; imagine how bad Spicy Marmelade was, and times it by a thousand. Escaflowne fans; imagine that bit in the end theme where it suddenly goes "DON'T STOP BABY!" for absolutely no reason whatsoever, and then imagine a song entirely composed of that moment. For the rest of you, imagine every lame highschool "hardcore" band put into a giant compressor and crushed into one five-minute interval.

Tomorrow at six am, I'm sticking it on full blast and I'm leaving it on repeat. And then I'm going to work.

So, thanks to the fucking city council waking me up at 6 this morning by trimming the grass verges, I've got a few extra hours of awake-time on my hands. So I've been giving this whole Raoul-on-top concept some thought.

(I swear, eventually I'll find a new obsession and then I'll shut up about POTO and Gerard Butler and everyone who has me on their friends-list can breathe a sigh of relief)

Have come to the conclusion that there are only three ways this can happen:

1) Raoul would have to physically chain Erik down in order to have his wicked Vicomteish way with him. Now, even leaving aside the question of blatent character-rape, such a thing would probably require Raoul to be some kind of super-sneaky bondage-ninja, which he probably isn't. Although that would, in a really disturbing way, rock. Also, the fallout from this would be hellacious.

2) Credit or blame must go to Brother Jonathan for this one, since he started the whole POTO/Gravitation silliness: Raoul could slip Essence of Schuuichi into Erik's food. I figure Raoul is probably a horrible cook, so likely Erik wouldn't notice the taste anyway. However, when faced with some twisted Erik-Schuuichi hybrid, my gut feeling is that Raoul will either be struck dumb with horror, or laughing so hard he cracks a rib.

3) Established!relationship!Erik and Raoul. And I do mean established. A couple of tearful kisses on a snow-covered rooftop do not a relationship make. This is the one that I'd really like to see, and at the same time and in equal measure, would be most cautious about reading, simply because it could go so horribly, horribly wrong.

Fuck it. I'm going to go paste Erik's head onto Schuuichi's body and laugh like a demented weasel.

Okay, so you know that bit in the Gravi manga where Yuki is at the hospital and he's talking to his psychiatrist, and he's like, "Why can't you just do your job and fix me?!", only with more swearing, since this is Yuki we're talking about? Yeah. I'm starting to feel like that.

This thing with my ear is getting fucking ridiculous. Just when I think I'm finally rid of it, it sneaks back in again. It's like having a deatbeat Welfare son with a drug problem. So today I went back to the doctors, got a new prescription for some different antibiotics, and then spent two hours trying to find a pharmacy that stocked it, since apparently it was discontinued two months ago. Back to the doctors, to be told that I'd have to make another appointment to get a new prescription, and that they wouldn't be able to see me until Monday.

Grr.

La!

Had absolutely massive anime haul arrive today - spent all day lying on the sofa watching Gravitation (how much is Yuki just Sanzo from Saiyuki with a haircut and wearing trousers?); Wolf's Rain (and yes, "Stray" is just as bad as I remember it, and Bondage Wolf is still as stupidly dressed); and Gungrave (they killed Spike! Also, Brandon speaks!), not to mention brand spanking new Witch Hunter Robin (Fluffy broke his leg, oh no!) and Saiyuki (I want Homura's little Godbabies).

The English dub of Wolf's Rain weirds me out, mostly because of the cast of the four main characters: Bondage Wolf is played by Crispin Freeman (Alucard from Hellsing, Zelgadis from Slayers, Amon from Witch Hunter Robin and Touga from Utena, among other things); Main Wolf is played by Johnny Young Bosch (Vash from Trigun, Fluffy from Witch Hunter Robin); Shiny is played by Mona Marshall (Izzy from Digimon, weird little kid Vash meets on the sandsteamer from Trigun) and Fluffy is played by the guy who did the voice for Tai in Digimon and angry vengance kid (TM) that Kenshin and Saitou meet in Kenshin (you know, the one that Saitou sends to live with his wife).

Stray, the opening theme, is as I've said, awful. Imagine Brian Adams singing a song in English written by a Japanese person. That level of badness. Have had it stuck in my head all day.

Gravitation is great, but only has three episodes on the DVD, which annoys me. There's nobody I recognise on the voice cast, which is a welcome change, although personally I think Yuki's voice is too deep. Then again, I was kind of hoping David Matranga would be cast. Casted. Castified. Whatever. Hatre is still cool. Ryuuichi still makes me laugh. Can't wait for the introduction of Yuki's crazy stalker-tastic brother.

Gungrave is fairly spiffy, if you can get past the first episode, which basically plays like twenty minutes lifted straight from the game. I'm still upset about Spike being killed. I really love the characterisation on Harry, though to be honest, I find Brandon's taciturn act slightly annoying - there's nothing wrong with being quiet, but the guy bloody well mimes in some scenes!

Witch Hunter Robin just gets better and better - loved the scene with the infiltration of the STNJ (Poor Fluffy! Did I mention he broke his leg?) and how Miho is trying to pick up the slack since Amon has gone AWOL. Micheal's still great, despite mullet-licious tendancies. The Chief, aka Hitler, gets some much-needed character development this time around, helping the Hunters piece together what's happened to Robin and Amon, instead of just bitching about them. Doujima still annoys me, though.

Also, we get to meet a new character, Nagira, who looks to be very, very interesting - a mysteeeeerrrious connection to Amon's past, and outspoken opposition of the STNJ's treatment of witches and seeds. I hope he doesn't die.

Saiyuki pretty much continues as it alwaus has - Hakkai still annoys me, Homura still rocks my world - I love Jason Douglas - Sanzo is still grumpy (in a cool way) and Kougaji is still useless. Poor Kougaji.