...way out on the corner of fucked up and evil...

I feel conflicted.

On the one hand, I genuinely believe that the BBC are a bunch of greedy fucking whores who want nothing better than to violate me in intimate and long-lasting ways. Which, as anyone who knows me well can tell you, is my way of saying that I really resent paying for a TV license when the only good show the BBC has is 'My Family'.

On the other hand, it's Sherlock Holmes, and I can justify it by saying that it's BBC Radio and therefore not affiliated with the grasping fucks who try to steal my money every year for the 'joy' of getting to see such classic shows as 'Test the Nation's IQ' and 'National Lottery: In To Win It'.

The Further Adventures of Sherlock Holmes: The Abergavenny Murder. Go. Listen. Lust.

My personal favourite:

Holmes: Can you tell how he died? (or words to that effect)
Watson: Not without an autopsy.
Holmes: Shall I clear the table?
Watson: For pity's sake, Holmes!

Also, look out for the strawberry jam line; it's an instant classic.

Although that bit with the tea at the very start reminded me of the vultures in Disney's 'The Jungle Book'. I was sitting here thinking, "If Watson says 'Now don't start that again,' I am so out of here." Selina, I know this is your fault - you're the only one to mention the Jungle Book to me in the last, oh, five years?

Well, the internet decided to crash while I was writing this, so you're getting the abridged version. Serves me right for looking at the Hot Topic website, I suppose (although they do have Sad Sam dolls).

Anyway, news in brief: saw the Sherlock Holmes movie on Crime Plus, guy playing everyone's favourite Napoleon of Crime looked like Gomez Addams, Holmes was fat (nearly pissed myself when he climbed the drainpipe chasing the snake-charmer dude), Watson was a drunk and Mycroft resembled my A Level law lecturer. Also, the safe-cracking guy was the same guy who playing Fumier in the Richard E. Grant version of the Scarlet Pimpernel. Needless to say, I was morbidly intrigued and will be watching the next one a week today.

Casting issues aside, it wasn't bad. Holmes was a bit of a drama queen with the heroin-injecting, but then, as Johnny pointed out, when hasn't Holmes been a drama queen?

Incidentally, the general opinion is that the Scarlet Pimpernel could take Holmes in a fight, though as Selina said, chances are good that Sherlock would suss the Pimpernel's plans and sneak off by a back route. Still, in a straight fight, the Pimpernel would totally win, because he's a dude.

Also, not to be insensitive, but this amused me. Sex acts and stuffed animals, indeed. That's how I want to go.

And finally, this is for Hex, who doesn't have a hand fetish. At all.