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Jul. 31st, 2005 11:59 pmLa!
Today I must urge you all to read the most awesome book in the world: "The Pirates! In An Adventure With Scientists" by Gideon Defoe. In it, a bunch of pirates meet Charles Darwin when they try to rob his boat, and are sad because he doesn't have much gold or ham for them to steal. Feeling sorry for them, Charles Darwin enlists their help in freeing his brother from the clutches of the Evil Bishop, who has taken Darwin's brother hostage in an attempt to prevent Darwin from making a fortune exhibiting his Manpanzee to the people of London, thereby stealing attention away from the Elephant Man, in whose person the Bishop has considerable vested interest.
Featuring such ingenius characters as the Pirate Captain, the Pirate with a Scarf, the Pirate Who Wore Green and the Pirate with an Accordian, and such fantastic lines as "I told him he'd get scurvy if he just ate chocolate all the time instead of limes", "There's a man whose head is too big for his face and no mistake" and "The trick is not to treat him like a gentleman, becuase he always starts crying if you do that", and of course, lots of talk about ham, it's absolutely hilarious and if you don't go out and buy it then you will drop dead of scurvy at the most inopportune moment and your corpse will be plated with nickle. So there.
Today I must urge you all to read the most awesome book in the world: "The Pirates! In An Adventure With Scientists" by Gideon Defoe. In it, a bunch of pirates meet Charles Darwin when they try to rob his boat, and are sad because he doesn't have much gold or ham for them to steal. Feeling sorry for them, Charles Darwin enlists their help in freeing his brother from the clutches of the Evil Bishop, who has taken Darwin's brother hostage in an attempt to prevent Darwin from making a fortune exhibiting his Manpanzee to the people of London, thereby stealing attention away from the Elephant Man, in whose person the Bishop has considerable vested interest.
Featuring such ingenius characters as the Pirate Captain, the Pirate with a Scarf, the Pirate Who Wore Green and the Pirate with an Accordian, and such fantastic lines as "I told him he'd get scurvy if he just ate chocolate all the time instead of limes", "There's a man whose head is too big for his face and no mistake" and "The trick is not to treat him like a gentleman, becuase he always starts crying if you do that", and of course, lots of talk about ham, it's absolutely hilarious and if you don't go out and buy it then you will drop dead of scurvy at the most inopportune moment and your corpse will be plated with nickle. So there.
