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[personal profile] froodle
A random cat came into our house today. We leave the windows and doors open all the time, so it's not a mystery as to how she managed it, but seriously, no cats EVER come in our house. Anyway, Tazzy went absolutely mental - I could hear him hissing two floors up and when I came down he had all four feet clawing into this poor little tabby and was biting her head. And then, when I tried to pull him off, he attacked me aswell. I have these massive scratches all over the back of my hands. So of course when Johnny got home I started yelling at him about it:

Froodle: Look what your sour cat did to me today!
Johnny: Well, I told you, if you bully him-
Froodle: I wasn't bullying him, I was trying to stop him from bullying another cat.
Johnny: Who, Fatnorange? He fucking needs bullying. He bullies Taz all the time.
Froodle: No, not Fatnorange, some little girl cat that came in the house.
Johnny: Some scruffy random cat came in our house? Tazzy was just trying to guard us from an intruder.
Froodle: No, he was being mean.
Johnny: You don't even know that cat! It could have been an enemy cat. It could have had bombs! What did your cat do to protect us?
Froodle: He didn't do anything because that cat was so much nicer than his horrible brother!
Johnny: You mean he just sat there like a fat piece of shit while poor Tazzy was risking his life for his family! I'm glad he scratched you, you taught your cat to be a lazy prick.
Froodle: You taught yours to be a vicious scrawn!
Johnny: Action Taz, the greatest cat of them all!
Froodle: I'm probably infected now. I'll wake up tomorrow with snaggly teeth and a sour black face and horrible rough fur.
Johnny: Good, maybe he infected you with his bravery as well.

After that it pretty much devolved into insults and hair-pulling, but if I don't update tomorrow, it's because I caught stupid reject-cat germs and had to go to the hospital!

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