The problem with watching Deadwood is that, awesome as it is, it makes anything else you watch look unbelievably trashy by comparison. It's like, say you watch some Deadwood, and then the next night you catch a couple of episodes of SG1, and all you can think of is that Al Swearengen would have solved all their problems ten minutes into the episode using only whores, liquor, card games and the occaisonal slit throat. And then he would slap Daniel for being whiny and self-pitying and tell him to get a haircut, and it would be totally awesome. But my point is, it's not really fair to expect the same standard of greatness from other people that you get from Ian McShane. It's like the first time you see Johnny Depp in something, and you realise it is possible for someone to be utterly gorgeous and a fantastic actor, and ever after you're just a little disappointed by everyone else.

Man, it was bugging the shit out of me that I couldn't remember where I'd seen the woman in the recording Mal and co. find on Miranda, and I just realised, she's Miss Isringhausen from Deadwood. Although personally, I find it hard to believe that a woman who can stand up, unaided, to the machinations of Al Swearengen while also having the self-control not to beat the shit out of Alma Garrett every time she opens her bitch mouth, isn't a match for a bunch of Reavers. According to the IMDB, she was also the hooker that pretended to have the stigmata during one episode of Nip/Tuck, although I only vaguley remember her, being more focused on what a complete asshole Sean was being about the Church in that episode.

And in completely unrelated news, oh my God Murdock is in an episode of SG1! And he wears glittery slippers and yells at Jack and it's way, way too funny and then he gets all narked off about people ruining his garden and Jack's like, "Heh", but all Daniel does is moan about his parents getting squashed by an obviously made-of-rubber monument thingie falling on them. God, Daniel, do you have to whine every time someone close to you dies? Jackass.

I always feel really uncomfortable whenever I see William Russ playing a bad guy, because to me he's always Corey's harrassed but loving dad on Boy Meets World and I can't reconcile him with being Alma's asshole father on Deadwood (possibly the only time I have actually cheered Bullock on was when he beat the shit out of ol' Otis) or a self-destructive ATF agent with a ten-year boner for Sonny on Miami Vice. (I'm not making this up, I swear; even if there wasn't the whole repressed-homophobic-self-loathing thing going on, that whole "Make me happy, Sonny! Make me happy!" scene totally speaks for itself)

Of course, I feel pretty uncomfortable right now anyway as Earthing has returned with a vengence, meaning I get to sit at home vomiting and losing money I can ill-afford to be without. Suffice to say, I am not best pleased.

Now, I'm off to find Sephiroth/Cloud mastubacest, and if anyone interupts me I'm going to shove a wire coathanger down their ear so they can really feel my pain.

Advent Children, oh my God! It's totally better on a second viewing, because the first time around you're all, hoping for AWESOME PLOTNESS but also harbouring the secret fears that it will be another Spirits Within, so it's like OMG TEH TENSION, but the second time around you can sit back, relax, and laugh yourself stupid at Kadaj's Oedipus complex. And also be relieved that the dubbed version omits the creepy leather noises. Why God, why?!

I was kind of suprised to hear Crispin Freeman playing Rude, as I automatically assumed he would be Sephiroth. I love Crispin Freeman, but he has this tendancy to make all his characters sound really, really pervy. Sometimes it works (Alucard, Rosiel, Touga-may-he-die-horribly-in-some-kind-of-accident-with-the-Akiocar) and sometimes it doesn't (Zelgadis). And on Rude, it just doesn't. Although I nearly pissed myself when he and Reno are talking about the bombs and Reno's like, "Flashy, huh?" and Rude goes, *pervy Crispin Freeman voice* "Yeah, you love it." I bet he does.

Of course, I completely forgive the casting directors because oh my God, Vincent Valentine is Shishio! This is awesome on a level beyond my comprehension, and completely makes up for the fact that Andrew Francis was somehow not cast as Kadaj. Because you know Kadaj is just movie!Dilandau five years down the line. Although I'm not sure I'm over casting Quinton Flynn rather than David Matranga as Reno. Way to pick the wrong Orphen, guys.

Plotwise, yeah whatever. "Oh my God, the Geostigma is being cured by the rain!" Yes, that's because it's dirt! Take a shower, you smelly bastards. Of course, if Yami and Deadwood have taught me anything - and they've taught me so much - it's that severed heads can make or break your affection for a character. In Kadaj's case? It totally makes it. And also Rufus's, because it's just hilarious to carry a dead alien head around in your wheelchair and not tell anybody about it.

So in conclusion, I guess there's really only one thing left to decide: does Sephiroth/Cloud qualify as incest or masturbation?

You know what never gets old? Jaynestown. I think I'm going to hold my own Jayneday celebration at some point. Not tonight, though, because I'm too busy being in hysterics over Hoople Steve fucking Bullock's horse to get back at him. That is the ultimate diss; to fuck a man's horse and then write "Bullock I fucked your horse" on the horse you just fucked. From now on, every time somebody pisses me off, I'm going to hire Hoople Steve to fuck their horse. Or women/children/beloved family pets, whatever. You go, Hoople Steve!

I'm still gutted by the discovery that Rollo Weeks played Mini-Gerard in Attila. Sometimes the IMDB is a curse, I tell you.

And now, it's time for fun with memes:

List six of your favourite shows

1. Firefly
2. BSG (new)
3. Kim Possible
4. Weekenders
5. Deadwood
6. BSG (original)

( Spoilers for Serenity and the second season of Deadwood )

It's here, it's here, it's fucking here! Six days after Play emailed me to let me know it had been dispatched, I now hold in my hands the deliciously molesterable Rollo Weeks a copy of the Thief Lord movie. YES! Hot underage boylove is mine in both fullscreen and widescreen formats. Sadly, the deleted scenes failed to include a Scipio/Prosper snogfest, but I don't care, because I know it happened and that's all that matters.

I was wondering how they were going to handle the after-effects of the roundabout, and I gotta say, that thing with using the original actors voices as their child-selves was just retarded. Especially Barbarossa - even leaving aside the fact that that kid looked like the Anti-Christ (and not a cute Anti-Christ like Adam Young or Damien in the first two Omen movies), that voice would have made any sane person run for the hills. But then again, the movie!Esther and Max were fucking psychotic, so it's probably a fair match.

Speaking of Adam Young, Jasper Harris? Bang on the money. If they ever get around to making Good Omens into a film, dear God, let him be cast. He's such a cutie; that whole "You forgot something important; it's under my jumper... it's me!" made me want to hug him and feed him sugar cookies and let him play with William Bullock in the land of Kids Who Are Just Too Damn Cute For My Black Heart To Withstand. They can throw rocks at Jake Lloyd and that stupid kid from the BSG mini-series from where they sit in the ajoining land of Kids I Hate And Should Be Thrown Out Of Airlocks After Being Eaten By A Fucking Annoying Robodog. What the hell was going on with Bo hallucinating about those animals, though? Uh, Prop, I think someone's been slipping your kid brother LSD on the sly...

For some reason, Vanessa Redgrave - who is in the film for like, twenty seconds - is the only cast member named on the back of the case, presumably because it's better than writing "starring that dude who was in the Scarlet Pimpernel and a bunch of Hornblower alumni that you've probably never heard of unless you're a total nerd who whores for Jamie Bamber in breeches". But seriously, what the hell? Why not just write "cast of rising young stars", because I guaran-fucking-tee, we'll be hearing from Rollo Weeks again when I kidnap him for my own depraved purposes and his parents start a campaign to rescue their poor, sweet child from my clutches.

More to come later on meeting John Connolly, the second season of Deadwood, and why Dan Dority needs to marry me like right the hell now.

Oh noes! Skanky Alma is in Highlander. I just cannot escape this woman; I swear Molly Parker follows me wherever I go, like a Spooky Chihuahua in a lowcut top and a stupid, unnessarily breathy voice. She plays the same character in everything, too; the only difference between Mrs Ramsey and Mrs Garrett is the colour of their hair.

Whenever I watch Deadwood, I always feel bad for Trixie, because part of me wants her to not have to be around that dozy tart, but having her on-hand with a well-deserved verbal bitchslap is the only thing that makes Alma even slightly bearable. Who knows, maybe if Chloe and Lois were more willing to administer a good tongue-lashing, (in a completely non-lesbian way) Lana might not be as insanely annoying as she is.

But I doubt it.

Oh my God. What possessed me to think I could work twelve days in a row? It's day eight and I already feel like death only very slightly warmed up. It's like the first episode of BSG where they have to keep jumping every 33 minutes and the little counter thing at the bottom of the screen shows how long they've gone without sleep and the cast looks progressively shittier as time goes on. Last Monday I was a semi-upright human being, but by this Friday I will have devolved into a shambling beast, all matted fur and venomous fangs and poisonous drool and wildly staring eyes.

In other news, Deadwood is so awesome that I can't believe I went this long without revisiting it. I was in stitches lasst night over that scene where Dan is getting all stressed about Al liking Silas Adams, and EB is all, "Oh no, you're still his favourite, he's just pretending to like Silas because he has to pretend to like that guy Silas works for," and then Silas walks in and Al compliments his haircut and insults his mother and Johnny is like, "Awww, they're so sweet!" and Dan has to take himself off for a manly cry in the titty corner. Although, possibly not exactly like that.

Jebus Christ, I'm tired. Had to get up early this morning to buy stupid shoes for stupid work because my old (but equally stupid) shoes fell apart on me. I was going to get them at Primark, since I consider work shoes to be one of those things that a person should waste as little money on as possible, freeing up extra income for necessities such as books and DVDs, but then I posed to myself a question that has baffled scientists throughout the ages, namely:

What good are shoes without cute animals on them?

So now I own a pair of Mary Janes with a kittyface on the toes. Life is good, and on that note, I'm off to watch Deadwood and revel in the pure awesomeness that is Al Swearengen. Later, cocksuckers.