froodle: (Default)
[personal profile] froodle
So Hayley has this weird pink think that sort of looks like a foam-covered pretzel that you squidge and it makes your arms toned or whatever. I was messing with it in the kitchen while Johnny and I watched Prawn destroy our kitchen in an attempt to make breakfast:

Prawn: What the hell is that?
Froodle: Hayley's bicep thingie. Getting my arms all hench for Halloween. Gotta look good in my costume.
Johnny: You can hardly squeeze it, you're not getting hench off that.
Froodle: I will be the henchest of all the Hegs. Even Buzz won't be as hench as me.
Johnny: You'll never be hench. By the way, I changed my mind about going as the Comedian, so you can go as him if you want.
Froodle: I was going to anyway, but I'm glad you realised that you're not sound enough to be the Comedian.
Johnny: Actually, it's because I didn't want to go as the guy who gets his ass kicked by a skinny blonde dude with a tiara and a load of gay porn on his work computer.
Prawn: Aaaaaahhahahhahhaah.
Froodle: Jealous little sour squad, can't take it that you're not good enough to mimic my costume choices.
Prawn: Yeah, because we want to be the spacker who dies in the first ten seconds of the film.
Froodle: If you get a girlfriend by Halloween, my costume and I are going to rape her.
Prawn: I'll get a super-ugly one, you'll be raping her and trying not to throw up at the same time.
Froodle: I'll pull my mask down over my eyes to protect myself.
Johnny: If you try to rape Hayley, she'll kick the shit out of you.
Froodle: She probably could, this fucking pretzel thing is a killer! How many of these can she do?
Johnny: I dunno, she does it when we're watching TV. It's like, an episode of the Inbetweeners-worth per night.
Froodle: Fuck! I'll roofie her first then.
Johnny: That is so not in the spirit of Halloween.
Froodle: Whingewhingewhinge, soursoursour. Who are you going as, then?
Johnny: Sonic.
Prawn: Gay.
Johnny: He isn't gay! Sonic's a legend, you shut your fucking ginger face and hurry up with my fucking omlette.
Froodle: What's Hayley going as?
Johnny: Tails.
Froodle: So you're going as Sonic, your girlfriend is going as Tails, and somehow that's not gay?
Johnny: No, because she's a Fox and Tails is a fox, get it?
Prawn: That sounds gay to me.
Froodle: Dude, I have to agree, that's full-on gay.
Johnny: You're a girl trying to get hench so you can rape my girlfriend, you're the gay one.
Froodle: I'll be in costume, fucktard, it doesn't count.
Johnny: It counts.
Froodle: You're just jealous because I'll be so much hencher and better in bed than you.
Johnny: Whatever. William! I want chorizo in mine, don't forget!
Froodle: Yeah William, our brother who isn't gay wants some sausage to start his day off.
Prawn: Haaaahahahaah.
Johnny: Hohoho, what funny little Hegs. We'll see who's laughing when I'm a sound blue hedgehog and you're dead from scrawny blond tiara dudes.
Prawn: I'm going as a crocodile.
~SILENCE~

Froodle: ...yeah, you totally win.
This account has disabled anonymous posting.
If you don't have an account you can create one now.
HTML doesn't work in the subject.
More info about formatting

April 2022

S M T W T F S
     12
3 456789
10111213141516
17181920212223
24252627282930

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Jun. 11th, 2025 02:06 pm
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios